Love Is a Mix Tape: Life and Loss, One Song at a Time
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- Create Date：2021-07-07 09:52:46
- Update Date：2025-09-06
- Status：finish
- Author：Rob Sheffield
- ISBN：1400083036
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Summary
Mix tapes: We all have our favorites。 Stick one into a deck， press play， and you're instantly transported to another time in your life。 For Rob Sheffield， that time was one of miraculous love and unbearable grief。 A time that spanned seven years， it started when he met the girl of his dreams and ended when he watched her die in his arms。 Using the listings of fifteen of his favorite mix tapes， Rob shows that the power of music to build a bridge between people is stronger than death。 You'll read these words， perhaps surprisingly， with joy in your heart and a song in your head -- the one that comes to mind when you think of the love of your life。
Reviews
Jeaux
，
A 3。5 with my current knowledge of books。This book is one of a kind。 The juxtaposition of love and music， such a great combination。 It got really boring sometimes because of the repeated content about music， but overall keeps the reader connected to the music side of things。 Long passages about their passion for music was inspiring to me。 The way he deals with grief is so mundane but true to the fact。
Lenkei Barbara
，
The easiest 5 starts I’ve ever given。I can’t think of good enough words to give this beautiful book justice。I read most of this book in coffee shops， and I had to hold back from laughing out loud at least once during each chapter。 I shed a few tears during the chapter “crazy feeling”， and the ending was so beautiful it made me burst out crying。 I was not ashamed。It inspired me， and somehow made me notice the little things in my life to smile about。 Even the voice in the supermarket I visit every The easiest 5 starts I’ve ever given。I can’t think of good enough words to give this beautiful book justice。I read most of this book in coffee shops， and I had to hold back from laughing out loud at least once during each chapter。 I shed a few tears during the chapter “crazy feeling”， and the ending was so beautiful it made me burst out crying。 I was not ashamed。It inspired me， and somehow made me notice the little things in my life to smile about。 Even the voice in the supermarket I visit everyday telling me to push my trolley off the conveyer made me smile， knowing one day I will move house and never hear it again。 I feel inspired to be somebody。 To be as cool as Renée was。I think I will hold this book close to my heart for a long time。。。I am jealous of everybody who will get to read this book for the first time。 It was the most fun I’ve ever had reading a book about the life of a random guy from the other side of the world。I feel nostalgic about the 90s， even though I was born in 02。Perfect book。 I enjoyed it very much。 Thanks Rob！ 。。。more
Emily Boedo
，
Never thought something could make me want to listen to Pavement and sob simultaneously。 Will be listening to “Wowee Zowee” and contemplating the meaning of life and death。
D。 Allyson Howlett
，
A beautifully crafted account of one man's affair with love and music。 I could not put this book down。 I must have highlighted a million different paragraphs about the feelings and music that were the lifeblood of this book。 Sheffield does an incredible job taking the readers through his life as a mixtape， highlighting music in a way that feels authentic， real and life changing。 Truly a great read。 I plan on replaying this one for years to come ❤️ A beautifully crafted account of one man's affair with love and music。 I could not put this book down。 I must have highlighted a million different paragraphs about the feelings and music that were the lifeblood of this book。 Sheffield does an incredible job taking the readers through his life as a mixtape， highlighting music in a way that feels authentic， real and life changing。 Truly a great read。 I plan on replaying this one for years to come ❤️ 。。。more
Inge Janse
，
Hoewel mijn jeugd bestond uit een schier oneindige collectie SA90- en D60-cassettes （overgenomen cd's， opgenomen radioprogramma's， double-speed-recording gedubte andere tapes， met twee cassettedecks tegenover elkaar gemaakte eigen radioprogramma's）， heb ik in die periode vrijwel nooit eigen mixtapes gemaakt。 Gek， eigenlijk， want ik was enorm fan van a: muziek （als in: enorm） en b: compilaties van al dat moois。 Als iemand zoiets voor me maakte （ik herinner me een basketbalcoach die een spoedcursu Hoewel mijn jeugd bestond uit een schier oneindige collectie SA90- en D60-cassettes （overgenomen cd's， opgenomen radioprogramma's， double-speed-recording gedubte andere tapes， met twee cassettedecks tegenover elkaar gemaakte eigen radioprogramma's）， heb ik in die periode vrijwel nooit eigen mixtapes gemaakt。 Gek， eigenlijk， want ik was enorm fan van a: muziek （als in: enorm） en b: compilaties van al dat moois。 Als iemand zoiets voor me maakte （ik herinner me een basketbalcoach die een spoedcursus metal gaf via 2 tapes， waarop ik onder meer At The Gates， Black Sabbath en Carnivore leerde kennen; bizar eigenlijk， achteraf， hoe snel je in die tijd bijna levensveranderende bands kon ontdekken）， was ik daar enorm fan van。 Hetzelfde gold voor het aanbod van de radio dat ik bijna verafgoodde。 Avonden en avonden luisterde ik naar Stadsradio Rotterdam voor Turbulentie en andere house- en hardcoreprogramma's die je per ongeluk even kon opvangen op de AM of FM， om zoveel mogelijk op te nemen op al 100 keer overgespoelde tapes， of mijn bijna neurotische liefde voor mixalbums als House Party en Move the House en label-samplers van Nuclear Blast en Moving Shadow。 En dan maakte ik ook nog eens eigen radioprogramma's waarin ik zeer， zeer veel moeite deed om de meest ideale compilaties te maken。Gek genoeg kwam ik daarbij nooit op het idee om zelf compilaties te maken van mijn favorieten， zodat alles op één plek stond。 Nee hoor。 Volgens mij hield ik me keurig aan selecties die anderen maakten。 Waarom， in vredesnaam？ Pas toen de mp3's hun intrede deden， ik via Napster losse nummers begon te downloaden en deze verzamelde op minidiscs en cd-r's， begon ik met het maken van compilaties （maar die dan nog steeds meer aanbod- dan vraaggedreven waren）。 Ik vermoed dat écht eigen compilaties pas ontstonden toen Spotify zijn intrede deed en ik mijn focus verlegde van albums en aanbod naar singles en （eigen） vraag。Rob Sheffield zat blijkbaar helemaal aan het begin van de muzikale voedselketen， waar de platen ontdekt en gecompileerd worden， om vele stappen daarna pas bij mij uit te komen。 Misschien daarom dat ik dit boek niet helemaal voelde。 Ik maakte nooit soundtracks voor mijn leven; de muziek die er was， vormde automatisch die soundtrack。 Daarnaast - spoiler alert - is mijn geliefde nooit overleden， dus ook dat raakvlak ontbreekt。 Ten derde is Amerika écht een ander land dan Nederland， inclusief heel veel onherkenbare culturele， historische en geografische iconen。 En als laatste luistert Sheffield compleet andere muziek dan ik。 De enige mixtape die ik enigszins herkende was degene waar hij met enig dedain over sprak als een top-40-radio-mixtape。 Damned。 En ik was juist trots dat ik zoveel herkende！ Maar wat ik het lastigst vind， is dat het boek grotendeels nergens heen lijkt te gaan。 Het is een particulier leven van een particuliere schrijver， wat net zo goed anders had kunnen lopen en door een ander beschreven had kunnen worden。 Daarbij irriteerde het me mateloos （lees: snoeiharde jaloezie） dat Rob zijn vriendin （zowel in leven als in dood） zo op handen droeg。 Man， wat hadden zij een leuke relatie zeg。 Zelfs hun ruzies klinken zeer aantrekkelijk。 Waarom heb ik dat niet？ Nogmaals， allemaal jaloezie natuurlijk， maar toch。 Ik heb onder meer geen Facebook of Instagram omdat ik snel jaloers ben op het schijnbaar prachtige leven van anderen。 Dit voelde soms als een verplicht te consumeren tijdslijn van die ene vriend die zijn geluk a: uitvergroot en b: op het exhibitionistische af etaleert。 Fuck you and fuck your happiness hoor。Pas bij het overlijden van zijn grote geliefde wordt het voor mij interessant， ook vanwege de raakvlakken die dit wel （en niet） heeft met een scheiding。 Wat rouw met je doet， hoe groot de medemenselijkheid van je omgeving in zo'n situatie is， hoe het zijn van een weduwnaar verschilt van het zijn van een gescheiden partner， hoe absurd lang afscheid nemen kan duren （en met hoeveel weerhaken herinneringen， locaties， gevoelens en gebeurtenissen uit die periode in je ziel zitten， inclusief hoe belangrijk het is om uit die context te ontsnappen）， hoe je weer uit je eigen misère kan ontsnappen - niet uit eigen kracht à la de baron von Münchhausen， maar vanwege de inherente vitaliteit van het leven dat （of je het nu wilt of niet） verder wil leven， en dat het verleden altijd blijft， en je enkel iets kunt veranderen aan je gevoel daarover。 Grotendeels is dit boek voor mij daarom 2 sterren: goed geschreven maar niet bijster interessant （of grappig， want veel van de grappen snap ik gewoon niet， bij gebrek aan overlap in het venndiagram van dit leven）。 Het einde over de dood maakt genoeg goed om er een voldoende van te maken， hoe macaber dit ook moge klinken。 。。。more
Elizabeth Walker
，
I really liked the way this book was written。 It was lyrical and lovely， and left me feeling a little sad， a little life affirmed and a lot like listening to music。 The author reminded me a bit too much of the kind of guy I would've dated ten years ago， but it was just nice to read a non fiction about a small slice of life， that's just kind of sweet and sad and kind of painful。 I really liked the way this book was written。 It was lyrical and lovely， and left me feeling a little sad， a little life affirmed and a lot like listening to music。 The author reminded me a bit too much of the kind of guy I would've dated ten years ago， but it was just nice to read a non fiction about a small slice of life， that's just kind of sweet and sad and kind of painful。 。。。more
Sabina
，
Este historia me conmovió profundamente， además de revivir mucha música e inspirarme para crear una playlist en spotify me emocionó。 Las personas que pasan por nuestras vidas， por corto que sea ese pasaje muchas veces dejan una huella indeleble。 La música une， aunque no toda y en este contexto social actual de escasos eventos en directo ha quedado aun más cristalino cuanto une la música y cuanto de nuestras vidas construimos alrededor de ella。
sri
，
a lot of the musical and cultural references in this book went right over my head but i still appreciated reading the memories of someone who holds music as close to their heart and life as i do。 music has been the landmark which has marked every good and bad memory in my life and reading rob reminisce about childhood， love， loss， grief and everything in between through the lens of music really made me feel connected to music in a new way。 i didn’t grow up listening to the same artists as him or a lot of the musical and cultural references in this book went right over my head but i still appreciated reading the memories of someone who holds music as close to their heart and life as i do。 music has been the landmark which has marked every good and bad memory in my life and reading rob reminisce about childhood， love， loss， grief and everything in between through the lens of music really made me feel connected to music in a new way。 i didn’t grow up listening to the same artists as him or make mixtapes or go through the loss of a spouse but i have my artists and i hold my playlists so close to my heart while i go through my own ups and downs in life。 despite our wildly different ages and different lives in different parts of the world i could connect with him because of one thing。 music。 it got him。 it gets me。 we both have music。 its deeply comforting to know that even if the artists change and modes of listening changes we’ll all always have music to connect us。 。。。more
Maria
，
Literalmente a coisa mais linda que eu já li。Música faz parte de absolutamente tudo e love is a mixtape só prova isso 🥺
Emma Jane
，
This is one of the best memoirs I have ever read。 It is so fun to see that journey that the author takes us through and the way that he makes his story funny and heartbreaking at the same time。 I found myself so invested in the people involved in the story。 I could cry and laugh within the same chapter。 I felt all of the emotions the author experienced and it genuinely made me love life more。
Lorena Machado
，
Quando ouço dizer que memoirs são difíceis de avaliar pq são sobre as memórias de alguém （e quem somos nós pra avaliar isso？）， sempre penso que não são as memórias， o plot ou as reviravoltas que são possíveis avaliar， como em um livro de ficção。 É a voz。 É a forma única com que aquela pessoa viu e agora transmite o que aconteceu com ela。 E nesse aspecto esse livro fez algo incrível。 Os capítulos são como se fossem lados de uma fita cassete， acompanhados por uma série de músicas que compõem a tri Quando ouço dizer que memoirs são difíceis de avaliar pq são sobre as memórias de alguém （e quem somos nós pra avaliar isso？）， sempre penso que não são as memórias， o plot ou as reviravoltas que são possíveis avaliar， como em um livro de ficção。 É a voz。 É a forma única com que aquela pessoa viu e agora transmite o que aconteceu com ela。 E nesse aspecto esse livro fez algo incrível。 Os capítulos são como se fossem lados de uma fita cassete， acompanhados por uma série de músicas que compõem a trilha sonora da história desse casal （recomendo ler enquanto ouve a playlist no Spotify）。 A única coisa que sei é que foi uma experiência única e emocionante， que me deu vontade de criar uma trilha sonora da minha própria história de amor。 Consigo ver porque Harry Styles gosta desse livro。 Vou falar mais no vídeo pro canal 。。。more
Sarah
，
i never really liked memoirs or biographies that much， unless it was someone i was really into。 i read this book because im a huge harry styles fan， and i saw that he’s recommended this book so many times， so i read it。 and i never expected to like it as much as i did。 i loved this book。 it introduced me to new music， told me how true love does infact exist in real life too， and i hope that robs soo happy now。 his and reene’s story really made me cry with tears。
Sabaa
，
I loved this tho it took me some time to finish it！ Music is the thread of life <3 what a wonderfully sad tale it is
Anel Musanović
，
“When we die， we will turn into songs， and we will hear each other and remember each other。”Ova knjiga je jedna velika ljubav。 Očekivao sam jedno， a dobio sam nešto sasvim drugo。 U knjizi nam autor na divan način piše o svom životu i pokazuje kako je život u svojoj običnosti apsolutno savršen。 Rob Sheffield je čovjek koji se jednom vozio sa Madonnom u liftu， koji je u autobusu jeo pomfrit sa bendom Linkin Park， koji je pušio travu sa bendom Massive Attack i koji radi kao novinar za magazin Rolli “When we die， we will turn into songs， and we will hear each other and remember each other。”Ova knjiga je jedna velika ljubav。 Očekivao sam jedno， a dobio sam nešto sasvim drugo。 U knjizi nam autor na divan način piše o svom životu i pokazuje kako je život u svojoj običnosti apsolutno savršen。 Rob Sheffield je čovjek koji se jednom vozio sa Madonnom u liftu， koji je u autobusu jeo pomfrit sa bendom Linkin Park， koji je pušio travu sa bendom Massive Attack i koji radi kao novinar za magazin Rolling Stone。 Uvodi nas u svoj život， nesavršen i dosadan。 Piše o ljubavi prema muzici， stvarima koje nije volio i o svom životu sa djevojkom koja se zove Reene。 Veliki dio njegovog života je bila Reene koju je mnogo volio i koja je samo nakon 5 godina njihovog braka umrla u njegovim rukama。 Sve ono što on opisuje zvuči tako realno i stvarno。 To je ono što je najbolje kod ove knjige。 Sheffield nam pokazuje da čovjek ima onu stranu koja nije uvijek lijepa， priča nam o nedostatku sreće i izgubljenosti。 Piše o ljubavi na divan način。 Načini na koje osoba može voljeti su beskrajni， a njihov način voljenja je bila muzika。 Predstavlja život kao nešto što ima svoje prednosti i mane。 Tako je realan i to ga čini tako zanimljivim。Stvar koja je možda najviše zanimljiva jeste to da svako poglavlje počinje sa novom kasetom i pjesmama koje se nalaze na toj kaseti。 Bilo da je to kaseta koju je on napravio ili Reene， uvijek nam govori šta ona znači za njega i kako svaka pjesma sa te kasete ima svoju priču。Divna stvar za pročitati ovo ljeto。 Knjiga koja ima svoje dobre i loše strane， ali knjiga koja prvenstveno ima dušu u koju ćete se zaljubiti。 Topla preporuka。 。。。more
Morgan
，
Sweet and sad and full of hope。 I’ll read anything Rob writes forever， probably。
Selena
，
I like music， I listen to it in the car， library， reading （sometimes） and with friends， I find comfort in some songs so that’s why when I found this book I thought I would absolutely adore it， but from the beginning to the middle I was honestly quite bored。 Rob Sheffield is a fantastic writer and he writes a raw and touching story for people who are HUGE music fanatics， he mentions older songs and references/song titles that I just didn’t understand。 Which honestly is my fault， the only time I f I like music， I listen to it in the car， library， reading （sometimes） and with friends， I find comfort in some songs so that’s why when I found this book I thought I would absolutely adore it， but from the beginning to the middle I was honestly quite bored。 Rob Sheffield is a fantastic writer and he writes a raw and touching story for people who are HUGE music fanatics， he mentions older songs and references/song titles that I just didn’t understand。 Which honestly is my fault， the only time I felt connected was towards the end when he talks about his grief with the loss of his wife Renee。 That’s when I can see how each song truly connected to him， I almost felt guilty for now knowing the songs。 The ending is what made me like the book， and although I personally would never read it again I can see why this books means so much to him and the many readers who have recommended this book to me。 。。。more
Goceom
，
This story is definitely great。
Fátima Heras
，
Si amas la música， en especial de la década de los 90s， vas a amar las canciones mencionadas a través del libro。 Más allá de eso， al ser una especie de autobiografía no llegas a conectar tanto con el libro， excepto que estés viviendo la misma etapa que el autor。 Los primeros capítulos y los últimos fueron muy buenos e interesantes， pero después se hablaba mucho de detalles y parecía relleno innecesario del libro， que solo le importaría al autor。
Alice
，
This is one of my daughter's favorite books， and for good reason。 Having read Joan Didion's account of mourning， I couldn't help but think of this as the Year of Musical Thinking。 It's a great read， and it often felt like conversations I have with my husband about music （only his and Sheffield's musical tastes don't quite line up all the way -- but they are close enough to feel comfortably familiar）。 This is one of my daughter's favorite books， and for good reason。 Having read Joan Didion's account of mourning， I couldn't help but think of this as the Year of Musical Thinking。 It's a great read， and it often felt like conversations I have with my husband about music （only his and Sheffield's musical tastes don't quite line up all the way -- but they are close enough to feel comfortably familiar）。 。。。more
Elena Vergara
，
cute
Bashayer Nouri
，
Rating: 3。5There are chapters here that can break your heart！ Rob is a great writer， and his memoir is amazing。 I loved。。。 LOVED， his love for music and his wife。He also made me want to start searching for my old Walkman and start listening to my cassettes and mixtapes。Review: soon。。。
Harryluver888
，
Rob is my king。 This book is BEAUTIFUL。
Noima Sors
，
I didn’t like the part where Renée died so 4。5 stars。 But I’m rounding up。
Ayushi Verma
，
So beautiful 😭
Georgie Walls
，
one of my favourite books ever ！！！ also recommended by harry ！ love how he writes about death so honestly and grieves through music
Dorina
，
This was the first memoir I've ever read and going in I was a little bit afraid of how I'm gonna find it， especially because I love Rob Sheffield a lot and I think he rocks。 But this book was amazing， it was personal and touching and filled with musical references I don't think I will ever get and Sheffield made an amazing job at explaining it well。 Music is also a big part of my life and I could relate to this a lot， we do make memories with songs playing in the background and sometimes it hurt This was the first memoir I've ever read and going in I was a little bit afraid of how I'm gonna find it， especially because I love Rob Sheffield a lot and I think he rocks。 But this book was amazing， it was personal and touching and filled with musical references I don't think I will ever get and Sheffield made an amazing job at explaining it well。 Music is also a big part of my life and I could relate to this a lot， we do make memories with songs playing in the background and sometimes it hurts after。 I was on the edge of tears on multiple occasions while reading it （took me a few hours） and I even had a good old crying session in the shower just to do it。 I love it a lot and I recommend reading it especially if you were born in the 80s you will understand much better than I did and relate to it even more。 。。。more
Nishti Baindur
，
I'm generally not one who's into love stories nor biographies。 Saying that， I will recommend 'Love is a Mixtape' to the ends of the earth if I have to。 WHAT A BOOK。 It warmed my heart and broke it at the same time and I loved every second of it！ If you especially love music and making playlists for yourself or your loved ones， you NEED TO read this book right away。 It doesn't even matter if you don't know the bands that the author mentions， trust me。 You'll still get your fair share of feels。 I'm generally not one who's into love stories nor biographies。 Saying that， I will recommend 'Love is a Mixtape' to the ends of the earth if I have to。 WHAT A BOOK。 It warmed my heart and broke it at the same time and I loved every second of it！ If you especially love music and making playlists for yourself or your loved ones， you NEED TO read this book right away。 It doesn't even matter if you don't know the bands that the author mentions， trust me。 You'll still get your fair share of feels。 。。。more
Shruti
，
It's a wonderful read。 I think I would have enjoyed it more if I knew about some of the songs he had mentioned。 Well that's on me。 It's a wonderful read。 I think I would have enjoyed it more if I knew about some of the songs he had mentioned。 Well that's on me。 。。。more
Anki
，
Except from the trip down memory lane with the tons of music mentioned， not my cup of tea。 The endless playlist I made of the thoma of songs mentioned in the book is a Fun thing to listen to， but the book itself not so much。 The emotions， the real love story and their passion for music ironically drowned in all the song titles。
Nicole
，